Monday, 30 March 2015

Can People be Emotionless?

Can People be Emotionless?
How can people be emotionless? Ever thought about it! Some people have this problem that they have difficulty in expressing and understanding the emotions of others. The psychologists call this state as “Alexithymia”. It can be defined as the inability to recognize emotions and their subtleties and textures. Those who have Alexithymia may face following:-
1. Have difficulty in identifying different types of feelings.
2. Difficulty in expressing feelings.
3. Difficulty to recognize facial cues in others.
4. Have constricted style of thinking.
5. They are also hypersensitive to physical sensations.
6. Detached or tentative connection to others.
People who suffer from Alexithymia rarely cry and are often seen by others as bland and cold. Their own feelings make them uncomfortable; they are not able to discriminate among their different emotions. They might be very effective performers, in a job requiring little or no emotional labour.
In nutshell the requirement is to understand their needs and devote some extra effort to look after them. Another pertinent solution is to get prompt professional medical advice and treatment. I feel that there are lot many people around us who are special in their special way. All we have to do is to be a little caring and compassionate towards them.


Never Give Up on Your Dreams

Never Give Up on Your Dreams
My son walked up to me one day with a very gloomy face. I asked him the reason of the dejected look. He replied, “I was trying hard to attain first position in inter-school swimming competition but ended up with fourth position. I don’t know whether I will ever get what I desire!  It was instantly reminded of a similar situation that I had confronted once in my youth; when things were not turning out to be good for me. My father gave me an encouraging talk on “Never giving up my dreams”. I instantly shared with my son my memories and the lessons that I had learnt. I would like to share the same for the consumption of everyone because every now and then we all come across such circumstances that we don’t wish to confront.
Never give up on your dreams no matter how big they may be
All human beings have some aims, objectives, visions and goals in their lives. We struggle all our life to realize those dreams. We all live in fantasies and dreams. Some dream to become a doctor, someone wants to make their parents proud, someone dreams to spend a happy and peaceful life etcetera. Every day when we lay on our beds and when we close our eyes, we all think about our charming and wonderful dreams. We think that one day the sun of success will dawn upon us and our lives will be shimmering under the jubilant light of the sun. We all earnestly desire to make our dreams come true through any means. But what usually happens is that as soon as we open our eyes the sun of success is gone and now the cloud of reality is hovering above us. We feel very depressed and miserable at that moment. We feel that nothing will come true as we had dreamt and hoped.
Of course they will not come true. Do you know why? Because lying in a cozy bed with a cup of tea in your hands and day dreaming will not make your dreams come true. To make them a reality, you have to work. No matter how many times you fail, just continue your struggle. I am reminded of a famous proverb, “God helps those who help themselves”. Just concentrate on your aims and missions. Do a lot of hard work in order to reach your destiny and remember God Almighty will always be there to help you. You will see the results yourself but you should have a strong willpower and determination because there will be a lot of stones and hurdles in the path of your destiny. But if your resolve is strong nobody can stop you from reaching your destiny. Remember the saying, “Try try again”! Just for once think whether you want to spend your whole life in feeling of repentance on the past and by thinking that you have not made your dreams come true or you want to spend your life by being proud and saying, “I did it, I made my dreams come true”? I know you all like the latter option. So come on guys lets promise to ourselves that we will not give up on our dreams. We will reach our destination by fighting our circumstances. We all will enjoy the jubilant light of the sun of success. We will show the world that we can also fly high.
We all will fight our hurdles until we reach our destinies. Nobody can stop us from reaching our destiny. We all believe that where there is will there is a way. It is time to take action instead of day dreaming. So get ready for your new adventure and ambition of life where you want to be in the life.
Enjoy the beautiful harmony of success. For a while forget your tensions, close your eyes and imagine you’re in the world where there is only happiness. Imagine that your all dreams have come true. How does it feel? I am sure your answer will be, "Great, awesome and so cool". Yes it is completely great, awesome and so cool. Now come back to the reality, if you want to have a world like you want it to be then you have to do a lot of work and remember the most important thing that is whenever you feel lacking energy than think of one thing in your mind, “When the going gets tough, the tough gets going”.
Remember there is no short cut to success. A wise person said, “Not failure but low aim is a sin”. Aim high, in fact the sky is the limit of your goals and dreams. When you fell pulled down, dejected and somewhat perturbed, just think about the end result and your eventual achievement. Best of luck and don’t ever give up on your dreams.


Watch Out For Calories that You Consume

Watch Out For Calories that You Consume
Now-a-days people are obsessed with the thought of not getting obesity. It is because of the fact that when you put on some extra pounds, it is very difficult to get rid of them. So the simple solution is, "Watch your mouth" and stay slim and trim. Obesity is the mother of many diseases that are known to the mankind.
I've always wondered how I should control my caloric intake. For quite a bit of time I remained perplexed simply because I couldn't remember how many calories are present in what I eat day to day. Nonetheless, the issue is not so complicated. You just have to glance through a table containing the requisite information and you are through with it. What matters is that you should have this at the back of your mind while eating unhealthy and unwanted food.

It's very important to keep a check on the number of calories you consume


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Calorie is a term that is used to denote the energy contents of food. It is basically a unit of energy that measures how much energy food provides to the body. Some foods are very high in energy. Our bodies need calories to function properly. The amount of calories present in our food gives you energy, proteins, carbohydrates, nutrients and fats to fuel your body. When you eat food your body turns the food into the fuel that it requires, burning it to produce calories. If you are at a desirable body weight and have plenty of energy your calories in food intake are probably OK. But if you are gaining weight and feel tired you may want to consider counting your intake of calories in food and changing your daily diet, because as you ingest extra calories, your body will convert the excess energy in to forms of body fat.
So my piece of advice is to look at your Body Mass Index, decide on a healthy intake of calories and stay in good shape. Excessive or un-burnt calories will for sure accumulate to cause trouble. Eat healthy, have a good life style and stay healthy.
I am giving an estimation of about 200 calories present in the different foods that are most commonly used by us, in our daily life:
1. Cheese Burger - 75 grams.
2. French Fries - 73 grams.
3. Glazed Doughnuts - 52 grams.
4. Beef Sausage - 66 grams.
5. Chicken Sandwich - 72 grams.
6. Soft Drink (soda) - 496 ml.
7. Peanut Butter - 34 grams.
8. Salted Mix Nuts - 33 grams.
9. Cheddar Cheese - 51 grams.
The list could have been in-exhaustive, yet it was appropriate to highlight those few items that are consumed mostly more. Watch out people, “Don’t get caught in the quagmire of obesity. Better fight the problem when it is still in embryonic stage. A slightly heavy tummy might suddenly turn into a bulging heap monster.


The Menace of Depression

The Menace of Depression

Are you under depression? This is one common question that we usually come across in our day to day life. Depression is one of the most common mental illnesses and occurs in all parts of the world and it affects all categories of people regardless of their age, race, ethnicity and economic standings. It is becoming very common now-a-days. Like a said earlier we hear every second person complaining, “I am depressed”. The phenomenon is being experienced by youngsters at an early age than did the previous generation.The social scientists and psychologist have proposed many explanations including changes in family structure, urbanization and reduced cultural, religious influences. Depression can emerge any time from early days to old age but mostly it begins in twenties and thirties. It comes slowly and gradually. Typical symptoms of depression are that the affected person appears confused, frightened and unbalanced. It causes serious changes in a person’s feelings and outlook. People, work and activities that used to bring them pleasure, no longer do so. He or she feels a deep unshakable sadness. Depression dramatically impairs a person’s ability to function in social situation. Females are three times more likely to suffer from depression than men.

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Here are some common tips to ease away the daily frustrations that might lead to depression:-1. Always think positive and constructive.2. Try to exercise and walk daily because it eases away tension.3. Stop being introvert; never isolate yourself from the society.4. Above all drink plenty of water as it keeps us physically and mentally fit.5. You must consult a professional (doctor or psychiatrist) for advise as promptly as possible.6. Meditation exercises are also known to be helpful in relieving stress and to get rid of depression eventually.My personal experience and advice is that if you are perturbed then take a break. A vacation to your favorite resort with your family / family would be ideal. In the process you tend to rejuvenate yourself, get time to think a solution of your problems and rationally think with a mind that is not pre-occupied. Sometimes it is good to detach yourself from a situation, only for a while, so that you could face off again with a better plan and strategy.Suggested course of action could be to go on a hiking trip, camping at a place having plenty of scenic beauty or it might even be a little fishing adventure. All these and such like activities take the stress away and impart a soothing, relaxing effect. If nothing else seems to work then do not get late in seeking professional medical help. 

Teen Depression

Teen Depression

Depression can sometime be very deadly.
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1. We all come across certain depressive episodes in our lives which could emanate from anything and everything. These occasional episodes of feeling blue or sad might not last for long. They are usually short-lived and one could get over with the mood “depression”. It refers to a feeling of despair, lack of will power and disinterest in the daily life activities. Those activities of life which used to give pleasure once are no longer a source of excitement. The feeling is often accompanied by a rash behavior or overreacting to situations. Sometimes people tend to become so introvert that they confine themselves to an inner shell and lose contact with the outside world.
2. In short depression is a very common and serious illness. Depression affects every facet of one’s life, may it be behavior (which signifies attitude towards others, day to day dealings as governed by the mood at that point in time etc) or thought process and overall feelings of an individuals. Visible symptoms could be frequent digestive problems, lack of concentration, insomnia, fatigue and an overall felling of pulled down. It could be a consequence of certain events in life or even induced due to adverse effects of certain medicines.
3. When someone has depression, it is a perpetual source of interferes with your daily life and causes grief and hurt for both you and those who care about you, those who are your near and dear ones. It is more prudent to analyse such symptoms in teens. The unpredictability in their behaviors could have very serious repercussions. Even the parents could tell what is going on in the head of a teen in melancholy. There is a fair enough chance that it might lead to such violent acts or tendencies as committal of suicide. Parents usually presume that such periods of depression will go away and don’t accord much attention to the actual issue. Simultaneously a feeling of helplessness completely sets in the teenager as they have an arduous time believing that their problems have a solution, especially in the wake of non-attention and lack of counseling. One cogent reason is that teens keep their pains, emotions and thought to themselves. They don’t like or want to share such appalling things with their parents.
4. The adolescent age is characterized by rebellious attitude, emotional episodes and egocentric behavior. This could lead to the tendencies mentioned above. Depression in teens is a serious mental health condition, which if not addressed at the right time, could have serious implications.
Symptoms of Depression in Teens
5. A lot of symptoms of depression in teens have been quoted. But the most commonly discernible ones should be identified to reach to the root cause of the issue. As parents if you notice following signs for over a couple of weeks, it should ring the danger bells:-
a. An attitude of withdrawal from the daily life activities, more prudently social withdrawal.
b. A rash, cranky or irritable behaviour. Excessive or repetitive behaviours.
c. Spontaneous rejection of polite demeanour and rude responses.
d. In the physical sphere symptoms like fatigue, lack or increase of sleep and lack of appetite.
e. It may even manifest itself in the form of declined efficiency at school, sports and an overall lethargy.
f. In the psychological domain it could be indicators like complaints or comments hinting at being worthless and not interested in life. Alongside, any critical comments about themselves should be considered alarming.
g. Writing notes about leaving the troublesome world or statements pointing at quitting. This could even be manifested as leaving or surrendering their favorite belongings.
6. The list could be in-exhaustive, yet I've tried to restrict it to the most common ones. In nut-shell if you notice any meaningless deviation from the usual pattern of behavior you should instantly start paying attention to your teenager.
How do Teens Experience Depression?
7. Those children and teens who develop depression will often continue to have episodes of depression as they enter their adulthood simply because of the deep nostalgic impact and lack of appropriate treatment/ help. Those teens or children who have depression run the risk of more severe illnesses in following years.
8. The symptoms of depression have been enlisted in the preceding paragraph yet at time they may be viewed as normal mood swings typical of children as they move through developmental stages. That’s why it may be very difficult for the parents to accurately diagnose a teens with depression. It is noteworthy that boys and girls are equally likely to develop depression before puberty. By roughly about age 15 the girls are twice as likely as boys to have a depressive episode. Such depression which emanates from childhood may often persist, re-occur, and prolong into their adulthood, especially when it is left untreated
9. Now let’s enumerate the few causes of depression during the teen years:-
a. It comes as a part of a change in the life of young boys and girls when they are trying to evolve a separate identity.
b. This is the time when they are grappling with gender issues and emerging sexuality, and to some extent they are required to take independent decisions in their lives.
c. Depression in teens could be as an outcome of other disorders such as anxiety, eating disorders, or some other form of abuse. The consequences could be as serious as the risk for suicide.
How Parents Can Help a Depressed Teen
10. Teens who are suffering from depression can be helped, so it’s important to get them appropriate treatment. When you observe the symptoms narrated above in your teen, you mustn't delay seeking psychologist assistance. In my reckoning the key to the problem is to immediately seek an expert help. It has also been observed that your teen would be reluctant to discuss the problem with you or seek medical help, however at this critical juncture this is the most important thing to arrest the issue from blowing up at the right time instantly. You may be able to reach to the root cause of the problem but you cannot administer the right kind of help; only a psychologist can educate you how to help and give you the tools you need. Here’s what you can do to render help to your teen:-
a. Help by listening to your teen. The most appropriate people to talk about the teen’s problems are either the parents or the close friends. They must encourage depressed teens to talk about their problems and related issues. Give them a patient hearing instead of giving a lecture (usual of the parents).
b. Don’t presume just react instinctively. Even if you don’t see any serious symptoms, you shouldn't presume that everything is OK. If there are some non-discernible signs in the teen you shouldn't delay seeking prompt expert help. Remember that it’s omni-important to save the teen in a serious dilemma.
c. Look out for talk/comments about suicide. At times teens directly exhibit the suicidal tendencies in their talk. This should be the leading clue. At this juncture you should ask direct questions and don’t be afraid of frank discussions. Bilateral silence is deadly, break the ice ASAP!
d. Professional help is the answer. Remember the most important factor is to seek expert advice from a mental health professional.
11. Likewise, if there is a need for medication as part of the treatment plan, try to consult a psychiatrist. Both the psychologists and psychiatrists might be required to work as a team in some of the cases.


Relationship between Parents and Children

Relationship between Parents and Children
We are in an era of science and technology. Modern gadgets like computers, laptops, mobile phones, gaming consoles etc have facilitated us on one hand and have created a gulf between the children and their parents. What could be imparted through a gentle nod, a little grin or a few words of advice cannot be substituted by any data bank of knowledge on the internet.
As we are getting involved into the busy life routine we tend to ignore the importance of our
Devote time for your family
availability for our kids for those invaluable experience and relationship. Relationship between the parents and their children is very delicate; it is primarily because of the reason that children have tender age and as a consequent not very mature emotionally. Due to young age, which is very impressionable, the kids are not really able to interpret things properly and at times formulate opinions that are misleading and not based on rational facts. It is usually the way they perceive the things to be or the way they interpret what they see.
So the prime responsibility of the parents is to get into the shoes of the kids and understand what they think about the things. The parents are the one who have to eventually deal with the problems of their children. Peers and teachers at schools play their role in grooming the children and improving their habits but is there a substitute of the parents' kind and loving words? We must look for an opportunity to devote some time for our children, not for the sake of improving their habits but to build a strong bond of trust and love with them.
Here are some suggestions to improve the relationship and level of understanding with your children:-
1. Spend some time with them to be able to understand them thoroughly.
2. Seek the opinion of your children. Allow them to give their input as well.
3. Have meal with them because that’s the time when they share their thoughts with you.
4. Let your children help you in small chores; this will foster the relation further.
There could be many other ways and occasions that you could capitalize upon in order to build up your relationship further. But the key to all this is yourself being available to your children whenever they require. Even if they don't need you at a particular juncture for any help you should still endeavor to devote time to guide them, show them your love and try to understand their needs and problems as they grow.